The Future Starts Here Day Eleven: Recap For Everyone Who Slept Through The Promotional Blitz

 

Yawn! Five more intergalactic minutes…

Wait the Kindred spirits promotional bonanza is over you say? What do you mean I missed it? I only shut my eyes for a short power nap! I haven’t prepared a speech at all! What’s that you say?  Ok then, I’ll have to wing it…

I suppose I’d better recap. I’m Henley Habridat (future star of book nine, now a work in progress!) and if you were asleep like me and missed any of the exciting instalments from the past few days then I’m here to remind you of what you missed. ‘Kindred Spirits’ is everyone’s favourite scifi-romance-comedy-drama-philosophy series and will eventually cover the next thousand years of intergalactic first contact between twelve alien species, our get-togethers, our fall-outs, times of wears, times of peace, times of wrongs righted and injustices vanquished (though so far we’re up to 750 years). As well as the eleven species who’ve introduced themselves to you these past few days (hello!) you get to meet space dinosaurs from past civilisations, meet marine beings from other dimensions and travel across the universe several times over. There’s no other series like it and you are privileged enough to get a sneak preview (remember, the future starts here!)

 You can stay in touch (well sort of, we are sending all this to you back through time via a colossal wormhole after all) and catch up on everything you missed, including the beautiful new illustrations and the terrific promotional videos (both well worth waking up for – and I don’t say that very often!) at the ‘Kindred Spirits’ website (I still want to know which alien species you all are: KindredSpirits: A new improved version of the 'Kindred Sprits' quiz - now with 12species to choose from! Argibraffes are currently winning but Habridats are in equal second place so come and help us get into first place – I’m too lazy to do it by myself!) You  will eventually be able to buy all the stuff from our Redbubble store one day, honest (they’re clearly as lazy as me – I approve!)

  https://www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives/shop?asc=u&ref=account-nav-dropdown (I ‘m going to buy a blanket with my face on when they come out – so soothing!) Or of course you can buy all eight books (in kindle e-book format and paperback) and two compendiums (in e-book format) at the Amazon page https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0DYNQ5VZC?binding=kindle_edition&ref=dbs_dp_rwt_sb_pc_tkin or you can be like my ancestors and sit around waiting for the Mekkions to do all the hard work by inventing time machines so you can see the future for yourselves.

A huge great big grateful Clandusprod hug to all friends, family and strangers who have supported, liked, commented or re-posted these eleven posts. You are all superstars who are ‘out of this world’. May you get the future you deserve!

Well, goodbye Humans. I was the last ghost of your possible futures. I’m sure there was some big message I was supposed to impart to you in order to set you on the path to success and freedom and wonder…but I’ve forgotten what it was now. Oh well, you’ll work it out for yourself. See you in the future. Sleep well and sweet dreams Humans!

*click whirr buzz* Your timeline has now been fully restored to the year 2025. Sorry about that: the future is so much better!

Also available by the same amazing illustrator

 

'The Promise of Persephone'

With a bankrupt estate and an unwanted marriage contract, Persephone knows her days of independent solitude are done.

Spirited away by the man who callously shattered her heart at their last meeting, it won't be long before he discovers her secret.

Enemies to lovers

All swoon, no spice

A bankrupt estate

Forced proximity

Found family

One horse

Finding her feet

https://mybook.to/uSdlKB

And 'The Bite Of The Amphis'

A magical serpent, an ancient curse, and the touch of destiny...

To save her people, Amara must not only travel through time, fulfil a centuries-old prophecy, & foil the plans of an insane, vengeful goddess, she must also seek out her own power & the confidence she'll need to accept the heavy mantle of Chieftain's Daughter.

Follow Amara as she overcomes adversity and fights to become the strong, powerful woman she was always destined to be.

Available on Amazon | Free on KU

https://mybook.to/p6sFu0s

The Future Starts Here Day Ten : Merchandise

 

Eeeeeep! Interplanetary alert!!!!! Humans scary – I’m going to hide under your table! Gosh isn’t your floor messy?! Sorry about that, I’m safer now, it’s just that when you’re natural prey you learn to take precautions. I’m Mrs Squeaky the Glabdihardit (though you can call me anything you like – just as long as it’s not ‘food’) and I’m here on day ten of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz bonanza to remind you to check out the merchandise store at Redbubble. Only things being what they are, it’s not quite ready yet. We applied over a month ago now to have our store set-up but a Doosbury Giant has chewed through a cable or something. Anyway this is to let you know what goodies are in store for you once it’s up and running at https://www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives/shop?asc=u&ref=account-nav-dropdown . Eeeeeeep. It’s exciting!!!!

In a universe this hazardous it’s important to surround yourself with things that make you feel safe and warm and cosy, so if you feel the same do check our the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merchandise shop one day. Soon you’ll be able to buy my face and those of ten of my fellow alien species on some very fetching pictures of me on lots of gadgets. All those things you really need. Like interplanetary burglar alarms! No wait, they’re not there yet…Interplanetary tables with inbuilt food-trays ad squeaker mufflers? Actually not that either. But there are a tonne of clothes (not tested on aliens. Mostly because they comes in such different sizes to Humans they wouldn’t fit), magnets (all the better for sticking yourself to the inside of your fridge for safe keeping!), Cushions (very useful for building pillow forts to keep you safe from harm), pet blankets (you’d be surprised how many Humans assume I’m a rodent in the future!), notebooks (useful for writing down the things that scare you: I have ten with my face on!),n clocks (because time is scary and you must keep track of it before it creeps up on you without warning!), buttons (too scary for me – I’m scared of pins!), tote bags (good for putting over your head and hiding in – please don’t do this with your Human invention called plastic, that’s too scary for our planet - as it looks at you funny!), masks (because airborne viruses are still scary even when we’re told they’re not a thing anymore, oh yes they are) and even a miniskirt (though Human legs are scary!) Eeeeep! One thing that isn’t scary is my illustrator, who really captured my inner eeepiness. Eeeeep!

Remember, the future starts here. If you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz – not scary at all!) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future (though I warn you: they’re scary!) Don’t forget that all the eight Kindred Spirits books are available at https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0DYNQ5VZC?binding=kindle_edition&ref=dbs_dp_rwt_sb_pc_tkin Till we meet again Human, stay safe. And if you inevitably can’t stay safe then stay alert. Interplanetary alert!!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!

The Future Starts Here Day Nine: Convergence

 

Hello and welcome to day nine of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz. I’m XXXX the Doosbury Giant, a gas giant from the gas giant planet Dooseus where we didn’t form from water but real-life lemonade lakes (that’s an obscure reference for all the Hollies fans out there!) You might know me from book four, as one of the Orpheneous children though I’ve, umm, grown since then. Is that lunch you’re having Human? Can I have some?!? It’s very tiring opening up a portal to Earth from several centuries in the future you know! I’m here to remind you of just how tasty the ‘Kindred Spirits’ books really are (I mean that in a metaphorical sense of course – I don’t recommend eating the books or your kindle; they taste of paper and batteries – yuk I’ve got battery acid reflux now). You might wonder what else can possibly be said now all the books themselves have been plugged but I’m here to tell you about the compendiums ‘Convergence’ one and two. Because if you’re like me then you’ll like things in ‘XXL’ formats and what can be bigger than the two Kindle editions stuffed full with four books each? That’s 1850 and 2460 pages of alien goodness respectively all at a knock down kindle price! Such a bargain – you'll never be hungry for something to read again! Plus as a bonus gives you more money to spend on your in-book snacks while you read! There’s also the very wonderful illustrations by my Human friend of course, which are so good they’re better than a tray of cream-cakes! No video today, but special mention to another Human friend’s videos that are so good they’ve given me an appetite to go back through all the past days to watch them all again! After all, even if you saw them all, there’s no best-before date on art is there?!

Buy volume one here rebrand.ly/yoleg4l or volume two here rebrand.ly/izcovt7
  (or why not buy them both and go XXXXXXXXXL like me?!?)

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), or – eventually – you can buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch at www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (they seem to be having teething problems at the moment and I know the feeling; when they’re up though you can get my face on all sorts of stuff including some nice placemats  and coasters, so I can join in with your meal-times too! ) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future!
Well I must dash now, it’s very nearly time for elevenses. I mean, technically it’s only 6 o’clock on this planet but that’s close enough for me. You, umm, aren’t going to eat all that pudding are you Human? Because I honestly don’t mind helping you out if you’re full? It’s no trouble…Look out for one of my friends for the penultimate day tomorrow! Yours hungrily, XXXX

 

The Future Starts Here Day Eight: Maintenance

 

1,2,3,4,5,6,6,7,8,9, 10 whirr click…Oh greetings Humans! That page took an illogically long time to load. It’s not like I’m doing anything that complicated – just creating a hole in space-time from 500 years in the future to send you a missive for day eight of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz. I’m Sparky the Mekkion and my book is all new and has never been out before, although it still has the same magnificent illustrations by our Human friend which are so brilliant they made me cry. Which is quite dangerous in a Mekkion. The acid in waters causes us to rust you see.
I ought not to feel anything at all given that we voted to have our emotions removed along with 90% of our body parts centuries ago, but I still have a heart. Which is why I was so angry when an evil Doosbrat hybrid named ‘Melon Rusk’ arrived one day and took over my workplace.  ‘The Universal’ used to be such a wonderful company to work for, helping translate things between all the twelve different species. I really enjoyed working there and helping aliens. I had a special job seeing things from a higher perspective, checking that all posts were neutral and fair. Only he came along and turned it into a business, named it after himself and even took away our ability to use vowels without paying for them! There’s something not quite right about him though. Could it be that he’s really just a front for politician Ronald Grump? Or an old Camalosian boyfriend of mine named Plaidimir Vutin? 

Of course nobody’s blaming them are they? They’re making us look the other way  at people who have even less than we do – at the newly arrived space dinosaurs to be exact, just because they’re refugees from another time who are a little bit backward. I quite fancy the dishy pterodactyl one named Zilda. Between you and me he quite turns me on – although I guess I can do that myself, seeing how I have buttons for everything. For love is what brings us to a higher dimension. Well, that and searching for the ‘porpoise of life’… Anyway something tells me this particular timeline you’re in would benefit a lot from what we learned so if you want to know how to defeat wickedness and tyranny either read the book or check out this amazing video by a Human friend who’s the sort of Human who has all his sprockets in alignment (that’s a huge compliment coming from a Mekkion).

Buy it here: rebrand.ly/kz9rh63

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch which logically should be over at www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives only their computer algorithms are still being illogical and down for, ahem, ‘Maintenance’ (you can get my face on all sorts of stuff including some fab technology casings for your antiquated Earth technology. What do you mean you haven’t invented holovisions yet?!) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon (it is a logical way of buying in bulk after all). Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7  If you have a ‘Kindle Unlimited account’ then you should go and add the book to your pile too. That’s only logical!
Well, that’s all for me. I’m going to leave you there and read my book all over again tucked up cosy on my sofa in one of my tyre-blankets with some battery pot-noodles. May all your diodes stay strong! There will be another alien along tomorrow. Yours whirrily, Sparky  

The Future Starts Here Day Seven: Experience

 

Harrumph! How do, you!  You took your time loading this message didn’t you? Hello Humans. What a weird looking bunch you all are with that fuzzy fur stuff sticking out your head, you lot should try some antlers! My name’s Moana which is apt because moaning is my favourite thing. I’m a Maggrumph. I harrumph a lot. Though I’m trying not to – there’s something about rubbing shoulders with the rest of the universe that’s knocking the rough edges off. Eventually. Love helps too – my Clandusprod-hybrid Lisa (as in ‘Moana-Lisa’) has helped bring out a gentler side I didn’t even know was there  ‘Experience’ is book 7 in the scifi-romance-comedy-drama-philosophy series ‘Kindred Spirits’ and it’s the most epic love story of them all, one so big we only just managed to fit it into Amazon’s page count!

Anyway yeah, it’s great mate, so buy it, twits. What, you want me to say a bit more? Well ‘Experience follows my adventures across six hundred years (including the events of the first five books). I was one of the first babies to be born in the universe after intergalactic contact was made and one of us from every species was put into a holovision  reality TV show  ‘The ITGang’ that followed our attempts to get along. Only it didn’t, err, go very well: the Belobrat presenter was only interested I himself, my friends all sold themselves out, I got into trouble for being too ‘honest’ and I got sick and stuck indoors. It all worked out in the end though: I got my dream life (on a farm on an alien planet), my dream job (as a grumpy music reviewer), my dream wife and my brood of adopted alien children. Most of all I learned to stop worrying about keeping up with my peers and to understand that everyone’s life is a little bit different and takes place at different speeds. How?  Well you’ll have to watch the video (not bad – given that it was made by a Human) and buy the book, with newly made illustrations (ditto). In fact no more than that both are so good they actually put a smile on my face. Well, briefly. It takes a lot to make a Maggrumph smile, so they must be good!

You can buy ‘Experience’ here: rebrand.ly/5jaypim

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch that will be up at RedBubble when they stop being grumpy www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (what no Maggrumph hat-rack?! I suppose the Human clothes with my face on it are nice though if you like that sort of thing) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon (although, harrumph, that’s far too much reading if you ask me!) Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 One thing I’ll never grumble about, though, is the fact that these books are free if you have a ‘Kindle Unlimited’ subscription!

Well, it passes the time as well as anything I guess, Jess, you may as well give it a whirl boys and girls. Hey I told you I wasn’t very good at promotion. If you thought I messed up wait till you see the other aliens, that’s all I can say! One will be along tomorrow. Worse luck. I think it looks like rain too...

The Future Starts Here Day Six: Obedience

 

Woof! Bark! Yip! Yip! Growl! Oh dear the Universal translator circuits seem to be on the blink. I must have knocked them with my tail…Wait, that’s better now.

Hello, I’m Dotty the spotty Argibraffe and I’m here to act as your faithful companion though the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz day six. Argibraffes are a bit like dogs and adapt the colours of every planet they live on – I’m a spotty Argibraffe but I believe you have tartan argibraffes living in Scotland in the future! I used to live on Earth as a humble pet, quietly living my best life doing all the things pets usually do: digging for bones, growling at the post-Mrasianart and watching documentaries on the ‘history’ channel. All until my Human owners put a camera on my collar and discovered that I was not only sentient but really quite bright, so they did what all owners would do in that situation: sent me to Clandusprod Community College to become a student. Enrolling and going to lessons was a shock to me, as I hadn’t even been allowed on the furniture till then. They’d never had an argibraffe student before and I made history – although I’d much rather be reading about it. Human history fascinates me so much. All that knowledge, all that understanding passed down to each other across generations all those lessons learned, you must feel very…communal! 

I’ve only ever felt that important twice in my life – once when I was saving the universe from an evil Human dictator named Chyren and accidentally opened up a dimension from times long ago past (long story) and once when I was illustrated by a very wonderful Human artist. Her likeness of me is so good it made me wag my tail most profusely. There’s a lot more to my story including a set of 12 intergalactic crystal skulls, some seriously dodgy (and messy!) flatmates, an absent-minded Mrasianart professor and his archaeology team (I so love digging for things!) and some space dinosaurs who roamed the universe 65 million years ago, but if you want to know more you’ll have to either read the book, wait for the series to come on the intergalactic history channel in the 24^th century or watch this fab video by another of my favourite Humans (please adopt me, I would love to be your pet!) 

You can buy ‘Obedience’ here: rebrand.ly/ukgiwfv

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch that will be up as soon as the Redbubble canines have stopped chewing through cables at www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (Check out the dog blankets which work just as well for argibraffes!) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 Not forgetting, of course, that the books are all free to read asd part of a Kindle unlimited subscription (it’s good to have lots of history to read). 
Well goodbye for now Humans, I wave a paw in greeting to your current timeline. I know things are scary and unsettled right now and it feels as if the bad guys are winning, but if you worry if things are going to be alright remember no they might not be now – but they will be, for I have seen your future and its marvellous. Eventually. Remember, be on the right side of history come what may and never let your leaders put you on a leash! Woof! Bark! Yip yip! 

The Future Starts Here Day Five: Abundance

 

Howdy howdy hi hi hi, it’s such a pleasure and a privilege for you to meet me – you Humans are my 11th favourite species! it is me, Buster the Belobrat, welcoming you to the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional publicity drive day five. And what a day it is – ‘Abundance’ is the greatest of the books (because I’m in it, obvs). I’ve enjoyed it so much that I bought three copies. All the better to read with my three heads! It’s also never looked so good either, thanks to the amazing drawings (which are ever so nearly as good as I could have done! Amazing, didn’t know you Humans had it in you! Plus this book is one of the two editions available in paperback in colour where I look even better!)

This book’s a short story collection featuring six happy (well, some more than others) couples who have found love through the universe-famous Earth site ID (Intergalactic Dating). I’m researching a new angle for my new show ‘Love Planet’, only I’m not actually that sure what love is. So come with me and find out through four seasons and
two intergalactic bank holidays: an argibraffe who falls for a Spice Girls
tribute act singer; a future Glabdihardit version of a certain TV series where
‘The Nurse’ travels in time and space in her trusty table (which is bigger on
the inside) with her sonic vegetable peeler while her two co-stars, a Maggrumph
and a Camalosian, fall in love; a Belobrat and an Agrosian who fall in and out
of love repeatedly (that one’s a two-header. Well four-header technically I
guess given that Belobrats have three heads); an innocent Clandusprod and
Mekkion escape long distance by heading to their first Airbnb on Earth (which
is actually in the air!), a Glabdihardit and Habridat ensign enrol on the
Doosbury Giant ship the SS Enchillades boldly going across the universe in
search of new recipes; and a fortune-teller Mrasianart scared of the future
meets a larger-than-life Doosbury who teaches him to live in the present.
Remember, space comes in fifty shades of black. Want to know more? Check out
this video – one so great I thought for a second I’d made it myself!

Buy it here: rebrand.ly/q9srwa3 or the slightly pricier but infinitely cooler

colourised paperback version here https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0F1NKVFJH

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch that will be up at
our Redbubble site one day honest www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (You can cover your whole house with pictures of me. After all, that’s what I did!) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 (plus they’re all free for Kindle Unlimited users. Let’s face it, my words are
priceless!)

Now that all that boring admin stuff is out the way I’m free to tell you about my life’s history. The day I was born was a very special day indeed. I was the (three) head boy at my school and went to find fame and fortune in…what? You’ve run out of room? Huh charming. Well, that’s all from me then. I suppose you can hang around the other days for the other aliens if you want to, but don’t say things haven’t peaked with me. I love you all. See you in the book, which I know you’re all going to buy right now! (I’m
a genius salesman, me!)

The Future Starts Here Day Four: Ensconce

 

Salutations and ahoyhoy! Verily, it is with great opprobrium, not to say a modicum of tumultuous zest, with which I, your humble scribe, Colin the Camalosian - further to be known as the party of the first part – commend you to experience day four of the ‘Kindred Spirits promotional blitz’.

Well, this is nice talking to a whole new planet back in time. Although you have my humblest commiserations for the current epoch you are traversing. Hang on in there Humans, it will get better. It might take a few centuries but it does get better. I’m best friends with a Human as it happens, her name’s Robin – she was the first person to be properly kind to me. Maybe you all will be too? She doesn’t think much of Humans but I don’t think you’re too bad. Some of you, anyway. I like the funny way you walk as if you were on a planet with the wrong gravity and you’re always about to fall over (my friend does – a lot!), the way you sneeze so cutely as if your faces are turning inside out and the way you fight for what’s right against the odds. Some of you anyway.

There’s a lot of that in ‘Ensconce’. What can I say possibly say about book four? Lots as it happens, which is why it became one of our biggest volumes (as well as the current biggest seller!) You’ll read all about me and my eleven fellow orphaned classmates in our coming of age tale as we try to make a new friends and learn how to trust again on the planet Orpheneous, a planet my friend Elfreda – she’s a Mrasianart –likens to the under-world. Which is very apt given that all the grown-ups are downright dodgy, from our hated teacher Mrs Maggrumphus to our three-headed-Master to the president himself and the COPOUT environmental team who are just sitting around doing nothing (‘COPOUT’ being a very apposite epithet). You see, nobody misses us so they’ve been using us for experiments and using a deadly red weed to pollute and destroy our planets. Mostly it’s us children who have nothing in common coming together and doing the right thing anyway even where the adults don’t. It’s not all scary though: you get to see what happens at the first ever intergalactic Olympics and all our fun and games along the way. You even get to read our homework as set for us by Mr Clandusprod! Me and my ten-year-old friends aren’t very good artists yet, just to warn you, but my equal second-favourite Human is a terrific artist and has really brought me and my friends to life at the start of the book in these new editions. There’s no one else I’d rather share my precious pencils with. Want to know more? Check out this amazing video by my other second-favourite Human who put it together for us- There’s no one else I’d rather share my limited and carefully hoarded Orpheneous computer time with!

Buy it now as an ebook or in paperback: https://bit.ly/3Y2Ahe3

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch which I’m told will be up for sale soon, honest at www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (You can be like me and buy four different notebooks so you can write four different things at once with four different claws!) or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 (plus they’re all free for Kindle Unlimited users. Which when you read four books at once like I do is really good value for money!)

Sayonara, Human, I must take leave of you forthwith and return to my own time now. Remember, always use your voice for right where you can, even when you feel you don’t have one. There will be a subsequent alien spokesman – further known as party of the second party – along in the morrow. Till we meet again in print, I remain cordially yours, Colin.

The Future Starts Here Day Three: Province

 

Hello, Human prey, prepare to die! Whoops sorry, I mean hello dear potential customers and welcome to your next potential purchase( I always get those two muddled up somehow). Welcome to day three of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz. My name is Bash! and I’m ^£%£^$*%*&()*%&**%^**(%%£”excited to meet you all! Welcome to the blood-red seas of Agrosia and behold the remains of our once glorious empire!!! In my day I was a much feared Agrosian warrior – mostly reformed nowadays, though once I was $£^$^$**(( scary!!!! I’m your third host and I’m here to tell you all about the re-issue of third ‘Kindred Spirits’ book  ‘Province’, which has been brought to life thanks to the amazing talents of a Human illustrator. She’s $$”^£^£$£”&*()*&&**%%$%$£ brilliant! She’s really captured both the fierce fighter I used to be and my calmer cuter fluffier modern self all in one!!!!!!
How did we end up so £”%£^$&(*(^& peaceful? Well, it all started back in the 20^th century when you Humans sent a probe over to us (Voyager I think it was) containing directions to Earth, information on all your various Human weaknesses (so very kind of you!) and some classical music that was so awful we took it as an act of war (though we quite liked the Chuck Berry and hoped he’s write us our new national anthem). It looked as if it’s going to be easy, given that you were in political disarray when the only person to match our great warriors is a lone weedy worrier Humrasianart hybrid by the name of Eleron and a cabinet of hopeless and lazy aliens who all seem to be in the wrong jobs. Not a match for our $£%£^$£&%$& glorious Agrosian armies!!!! However it didn’t quite turn out that way we planned it to. It's a thoughtful philosophical book all about boundaries and what happens when people and armies break them. With scenes of lots of noisy destruction!!!  Want to know more?  Then check out the video by another Human friend of ours (he’s supremely ^%$£^£$&%*)*(%$£ talented too!) Want to know even more? Then stop bothering me and read the &%%£^£&$*%* book! It’s out now for Kindle and in paperback so you have no excuse!!!!

You can buy the e-book here https://bit.ly/4iY7CyT or the paperback here https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0F1LLSWJY  No I don’t know why they aren’t %£^£^& listed together either – I shall have %£&$£^&$£& words with Amazon later!!!

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow for more Kindred Spirits-related weirdness then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz. I hope it’s me!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch that will hopefully eventually turn up at Redbubble when they get their ^$$£”% act together  www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (we weren’t allowed to make any spears available sadly, in case your infants hurt themselves but there is a laptop case with my face on it for when you want to slam yours against the %$£%$£&*%*&( wall – I know what you Humans are like!) Or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Or of course you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l

Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 though mine is the “”!^£$&$& best obviously!!!
 (plus they’re all free for Kindle Unlimited users. What, free?! Not even a Human sacrifice or two? What amazing value!)

Goodbye for now Human. Remember make your future decisions wisely or the glorious might of the Agrosian empire might be invading you sooner than you think and this might be a $£$£^%$&&& different story next time round…

 

The Future Starts Here Day Two: Insurgence

 

*Intensely stares at computer screen waiting for a deep connection, to both universal internet and potential reader*

Cosmic greetings to you brethren! Welcome to day two of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ promotional blitz. Come in to my Mrasianart music room and put your feet up by my tuba. Yes you’re on Mras now. Nice and warm isn’t it? No that’s not a typo by the way, it’s not ‘Mars’; we’re a long way from your solar system, in fact other at the opposite end of the universe – we are there, you just haven’t discovered us yet, that’s all. Gosh what weird legs you Humans have, I bet you can’t even play music with them. How did any species ever evolve without the in-built ability to carry their music around with them everywhere? I’m Auberon by the way, pleased to meet you. I guess I’m what you Humans might call a grasshopper with ideas above my station. No, don’t reach for the fly-swat! I’m peaceful, honest!

I have chosen you to impart this special message because your chakras seem particularly wide open to understanding the urgency of intergalactic contact and peace in the times to come. I know first-hand how dangerous people can be to off-worlders they don’t understand them but you seem different, more evolved somehow. That’s why I’m here you see, to prepare you for what’s to come in another hundred years or so, thanks to my role as second host of the ‘Kindred Spirits’ series celebrating the re-issue of the entire 8 volume scifi-romance-action-comedy-philosophy series ‘Kindred Spirits’ now available for kindle and in paperback with new illustrations by an amazingly talented artist from your planet Earth (I’ve never known such a rueles-coloured aura in a Human before, but I sense a part of it in a lot of you Human viewers I’m speaking to too: you’re very open-minded and big-hearted I can tell. Which of course is why you’re all going to buy lots of books!)
I’m from second book ‘Insurgence’, in which a Human named Eleanor comes to my planet to escape Earth because she’s heard it’s a spiritual haven full of fortune-tellers, tarot readers, tranquillity, equality and music. She’s pretty wonderful: I couldn’t ask for a better guitar accompanist or a better mother to our hybrid child, Eleron. Exactly the sort of brave, kind, resilient soul who gives me faith in other people. Harmony that’s all both of us had ever wanted in every meaning of the word – and we had it for a blissful while there too. Only our new president Almathea is too busy learning from Human history how to be a prejudiced tyrant hoarding things for himself. Good job we put our Intergalactic Peace Orchestra together to make our voices heard about what the people really think away from the lies and propaganda – though how well that goes you’ll have to read for yourself. As a bonus our future intergalactic best-seller includes a sneak preview of the 23rd century’s biggest hits ‘We Reach Out’ and ‘We Are All One Universe (And We’re Only 87 Quadzillion Light Years Apart’). Or you can have a watch of the ‘Insurgence’ video by another very talented Human creative (Wow two of you - I’ve never known such wide open chakras in a species that weren’t Mrasianarts before!)

You can buy it here, in ebook or in paperback formats. Sadly no 3rd century holovision editions around yet but you've got that to look foward to! amzn.to/4bZ1VOR

Remember, the future starts here. But if you can’t wait for tomorrow then come visit the website www.kindredspiritbooks.blogspot.com (you can even find out which alien you most resemble in our fun quiz!), buy the ‘Kindred Spirits’ merch to be added as soon as our century’s timeline synchronises with yours at www.redbubble.com/people/AlansArchives (who wouldn’t want a Mrasianart Universal case, sorry mobile phone case?! Although sadly there are no musical instruments available with my face on as yet – I so love the wazullah!) Or if you want to do things the easy way just look out for one of the Mekkion time-travel machines from the future! Then again you could just immerse yourself in eleven whole other worlds by buying the e-books, paperbacks or the two compendiums over at Amazon Convergence I: rebrand.ly/yoleg4l Convergence II: rebrand.ly/izcovt7 (plus they’re all free for Kindle Unlimited users, where they can nestle against your other books in perfect harmony).
Right, that is my mission of peace over. Another alien will be along to meet you tomorrow. Farewell dear Human! Till we meet again. Remember always reach out in the darkness to help a friend – and always be aware that while there’s a lot of darkness in space oh those beautiful starry flecks of hope shine so brightly…